“Why are you still single?”
Fine. I’ll answer your stupid question.
I work a lot.
I moved to New York to get my career started, so it’s kind of a big deal. 99% of the time, I don’t want to do anything after work but go straight home, cook dinner, eat, and sleep. I don’t care how hot you are. I’m tired, and I have to do it all over again tomorrow. Plus, I usually don’t know at what time I’ll be getting out of work. Could be 6pm. Could be 2am. So if we do make plans, there’s a good chance I might have to reschedule. And yeah, that’s annoying. Not just for you, but for me too.
I like casual sex.
I’m not even trying to make a statement. Sometimes, I just don’t want to put forth the effort beyond the bedroom. And no, that doesn’t mean I’ll sleep with you.
You don’t like cats? I’m out. Don’t know the difference between your andyou’re? Bye. Voting for Trump? Get the fuck out of my face.
Dating gets harder with age.
Not because you suddenly forget how to do it. Hell no. I’m 31, and I’m a fucking expert. But things get a little more complicated as you get older. People have more baggage. Between ex-spouses and babies, a person would have to be really worth my while for me to be up for all that.
Robert Downey, Jr.
He exemplifies my ideal mate. He’s sexy. He has a unique sense of style, one that he rocks like a god. He cares about animals. Oh, and that smile… Best of all, he’s funny and witty. And wit is the fuckin’ sexiest thing in the world. That’s not an opinion, by the way. It’s a downright fucking fact. Sure, he has a history of addiction. So he’s flawed, as we all are. But he fought a battle, and he won. Rawr. I want an RDJ in my life. I need an RDJ in my life. If I could find one like him, then I’d be set. But there is only one RDJ.
I hope that answers your question. Now, get me another vodka soda.
For more of Anna’s sexy, sassy, and sometimes just downright dirty writing, check out: To the stranger who stood in front of me in the subway car, I Can’t Stop Masturdating, & I Slut It Up When I’m Bored. Or follow her on Twitter.